3 Pee No-Nos

I like to pee. I think that's been established, but there are three things about peeing that really gets my anger flowing. I like to call them the 3 Pee No-Nos.

So without further ado, here they are:

1. Splashback- There's nothing worse than letting loose in a urinal only to have some of your liquid waste splash back and hit your skin. It makes you feel dirty in a bad way.

2. Peeing into other people's pee- I hate when other people leave their pee in the bowl as if not flushing it will save water. I'm going to flush your pee before I pee into it, because the thought of getting splashed back with a mixture of more than my own pee is horrifying.

3. Peeing on the seat- If you're going to pee, you must agree; it's best to do so with the seat up. If your aim is so bad that you cannot conduct your business in the middle of the bowl there's no harm in admitting your inability to hit the bullseye. It's not like anyone's watching you or you need to get one right in the middle. No one expects you to be Phil "The Power" Taylor. To make your pee complete, just lift up that seat.