Greetings Com-pee-triots! I, Tweet Pee, would like to sincerely apologize for my lengthy hiatus from this here blog and from my tweeting pee-sponsiblities. I hope no one is too pissed off to accept me back into their hearts and restrooms.
You might think my absence from the Internet was for purely selfish reasons and maybe it was, but I fear that I had lost my connection to the natural act of urination. It had become solely a means to the end that was this largely unsuccessful web venture instead of just one of my natural processes. I needed a clear mind, a pure heart, and a recently emptied bladder if I was going to go back to square one and rediscover the inner taker of number ones within.
While most folks are just content to just do the "master cleanse" and start anew, Tweet Pee sought sanctuary in the wilderness and water closets of the Far East. After months of holding it in at the behest of some of the sagest bathroom attendants in all of the land, Tweet Pee finally came to achieve total and utter inner peace when he reached the most pee-ceful place on earth, a.k.a. the restroom of a Healthland Spa in Bangkok, Thailand.
The serene accompaniment of soothing music mixed in with the sound of flowing water and the sight of plant life flourishing, left Tweet Pee filled with the joie de vivre one feels when one has a suitable epiphany. At the site of those standing porcelain gods, Tweet Pee let the river flow as if it had been dammed up for a thousand years. That true feeling of relief was a rebirth for both Tweet Pee and this blog.
So it is with great pride and a renewed vigor that Tweet Pee relaunches "The Life and Streams of Tweet Pee" in the hopes you will follow along and show reverence to this most basic of bodily functions. Stay tuned for a virtual babbling brook of bloggery.
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